Children Are People Too

Directory

Program
- Confidentiality
- Assessment

EFAP/ARS
Model

Services
- Advantages
- Library

Funders

Vision/Mission

Key Criteria

Insight EFAP
International

Email
Phone: 437-4776

FastCounter
by bCentral

View best @
800x600 pixels
Internet Explorer

Lower Mainland Assessment & Referral Service (EFAP/ARS) width=

"Children Are People Too!"

If you began a new job and no one told you the rules, you would feel uncomfortable and insecure. Young children, faced with new situations, need help to learn what is expected of them. Being a parent means being able to understand a child's emotional needs and learning to effectively handle them. To help your child feel secure, keep the following in mind.

Give praise for a job well done! A child feels encouraged to do as well, or better, the next time. Praise for being good is more effective than scolding. If it bothers you when your child slams a door, ignore the slams and praise her when she/he closes the door quietly. When you comment on unwanted actions, do so in a positive way. For example, rather than "Don't slam the door, Jill", try instead "Please close the door quietly, I prefer it that way".

Be consistent! Your child also needs to know what to expect. Rules, routines and consistent discipline will help your child feel secure.

Have house rules! It's important that your child understand the rules you set and that the rules work well for the entire family. Keep the following in mind when setting rules:

Set rules which meet your desires, but make sure they don't deny the needs of your child. Rather than "no skipping in the house", try "skipping in the basement only".
Don't set too many rules. If you have a long list to remember, it will make being consistent more difficult.
Apply rules that your child can understand and is capable of following.
As your children get older, let them participate in setting rules and in deciding what will happen if a rule is broken. This will let them feel they have rights, and chances are that fewer rules will be broken.

Young children need constant reassurance that you love them. Love is the greatest gift you can give your child.

Set an example! Children imitate you. Your behaviour will influence your child's behaviour. For example, if you tend to slam the door when angry, they may learn to do the same. Be sure that your example shows how you wish your child to behave.

Children need routines! Help your child to feel secure by following a predictable program. Set times for meals, naps, bath and bedtime. This is important for young children who need the security of knowing what to expect and what is expected of them.

Make sure you have consistent discipline! The key in discipline is consistency! Both parents should agree and your children should understand what will happen if they break a rule or misbehave. You should handle conflicts or problems consistently. If you discipline them once for turning on the TV without permission, you shouldn't ignore them doing it a second time.

The gift of love! Young children need constant reassurance that you love them. Love is the greatest gift you can give your child. You can show your love by:

Saying "I love you" without conditions.
Kissing and hugging.
Going places, talking, or playing together.
Showing an interest in their activities.
Listening very carefully.
Doing something special; perhaps giving them a treat.
Giving each child some of your individual time.

When children know they are loved, they will develop good feelings and self-confidence. Constant love reassures a child. With a good self-image, they will be willing to try new things and to think for themselves.

EFAP/ARS Trademark