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"Bully Behaviour"

There is a ruff, tuff part of each one of us, who represents our Bully Behavior part. This part can be hurtful to others. Bully Behavior is acting in a mean way towards someone smaller or weaker. Bully Behavior are things that you do or say to hurt others. Examples of Bully Behavior are teasing to hurt someone, trying to frighten or control someone or intimidating someone to do something that they do not want to do. Calling someone a bully is Bully Behavior!

Why do we hurt others? Bully Behavior is learned. People who need to bully have usually been hurt or teased by others and they pass this behavior on. Other reasons are for attention and not knowing how to play in appropriate ways. Some people do Bully Behavior when they are angry and throw their angry feelings out on others.

Often the person who does Bully Behavior feels unwanted, unloved and insecure. The person who hurts others through his words and actions may feel good about making another person feel bad. He may feel powerful for a short time when he teases or hurts someone else. Later he may feel guilty and ashamed of what he did or he may justify his behavior by thinking that the other person deserved it.

Some people who need to hurt others secretly feel bad inside. They are so afraid of being seen as weak that they act tough. They are even afraid to let themselves know about it. Their insides and outsides do not match. They are unhappy on the inside and act tough on the outside. They are like a toasted marshmallow--tough on the outside but squishy and soft on the inside. Deep inside there is a core of bad feelings so hidden away that they can't even know about it. It's helpful to know about this part of ourselves; then we can make good choices.

Helper Words to Help Me Stop My Bully Behavior:

  • I watch myself to listen for name calling and blaming words.
  • I stop myself from turning up my own heat with bully words.
  • I can feel good about stopping my own Bully Behavior
  • I can be responsible for everything I say and do.
  • I feel good about being a responsible person!
  • I take a chill pill when I am upset.
  • I treat others the way I want to be treated.
  • I stop my Bully Behavior.
  • I feel good about treating others with respect.




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